I was at a restaurant a while back that had this little ditty included in a newsletter. Who knew that Dr. Seuss had a computer? Anyway, I think it's cute and I hope you get a chuckle out of it, too.
If a packet hits a pocket on a socket on a port, and the bus is interrupted at a very last resort, and the access of the memory makes your floppy disk abort, then the socket packet pocket has an error to report.
If your cursor finds a menu item followed by a dash, and the double-clicking icon puts your window in the trash, and your theta is corrupted cause the index doesn't hash, then your situation's hopeless and your system's gonna crash!
If the label on the cable on the table at your house, says the network is connected to the button on your mouse, but your packets want to tunnel to another protocol, that's repeatedly rejected by the printer down the hall.....
And your screen is all distorted by the side effects of guass, so your icons in the window are as wavy as a souse; then you may as well reboot and go out with a bang, 'cuz sure as I'm a poet, the sucker's gonna hang.
When the copy on your floppy's getting sloppy in the disk, and the macro code instructions is causing unnecessary risk, then you'll have to flash the memory and you'll want to RAM your ROM, and then quickly turn off the computer and be sure to tell your Mom!
Showing posts with label computers. Show all posts
Showing posts with label computers. Show all posts
Tuesday, November 2, 2010
Friday, June 11, 2010
I think I crashed my new computer!
Wow! What a crazy week. I’m three days into a new computer with all the learning of new programs and reconfiguring that goes on with that. I’m not opposed to learning new things, otherwise I’d have never purchased a new computer to begin with. Right? Well, other than the fact that my old laptop was nearly dead. Even with it plugged into the wall, it barely works anymore. Kind of scary when I have several novels that I’m working hard on and wanting to get published.
So. Funny story about the new computer—apparently they don’t offer Outlook Express anymore for an email program. They offer Windows Instant Messanger—which is great. Other than the small little detail that no where did I find instructions on how to pull it up and use it. I spent a whole day trying to figure it out. That, and activating my anti-virus software etc. etc. etc. Why couldn’t I figure out how to use the email program??? Sooo frustrating! I called a man in my ward that’s good with computers. Trained in them, I think.
He suggested that I download Thunderbird. It’s an email program by Mozilla. I did that, and was able to use my email. It was great except for the pop-ups that kept saying that Cableone (my Internet provider) was not secure and they (the computer) didn’t want to accept it. Annoying.
He came by last night and spent an hour trying to get the old emails off of my old computer into a file so that he could transfer them onto my new computer. It never worked, so he went home and I figured that I’d have to go to the store and buy a large zip-drive to transfer it myself.
This morning I got up ready to make a few last edits to my novel before sending it out into the lone world of publishers and lo and behold, everything on my computer had disappeared! You got that right—I panicked!!! A three day old computer and I’d already ruined it. I called the man who helped me, and he assured me that he hadn’t done anything that would delete everything off of my computer, so I called Dell.
This is one of the reasons I bought a Dell computer—their service. The Dell tech took a hold of my computer remotely and restored it to its previous newness. Apparently, it was the Cookies' fault. One of them was fighting with the Thunderbird cookies. Naughty cookies. When I told the tech that the only reason I downloaded Thunderbird is because I couldn’t figure out how to use the email program that the computer came with, he set it all up for me. I think the whole thing only took about an hour and a half. I feel much better now.
So. Funny story about the new computer—apparently they don’t offer Outlook Express anymore for an email program. They offer Windows Instant Messanger—which is great. Other than the small little detail that no where did I find instructions on how to pull it up and use it. I spent a whole day trying to figure it out. That, and activating my anti-virus software etc. etc. etc. Why couldn’t I figure out how to use the email program??? Sooo frustrating! I called a man in my ward that’s good with computers. Trained in them, I think.
He suggested that I download Thunderbird. It’s an email program by Mozilla. I did that, and was able to use my email. It was great except for the pop-ups that kept saying that Cableone (my Internet provider) was not secure and they (the computer) didn’t want to accept it. Annoying.
He came by last night and spent an hour trying to get the old emails off of my old computer into a file so that he could transfer them onto my new computer. It never worked, so he went home and I figured that I’d have to go to the store and buy a large zip-drive to transfer it myself.
This morning I got up ready to make a few last edits to my novel before sending it out into the lone world of publishers and lo and behold, everything on my computer had disappeared! You got that right—I panicked!!! A three day old computer and I’d already ruined it. I called the man who helped me, and he assured me that he hadn’t done anything that would delete everything off of my computer, so I called Dell.
This is one of the reasons I bought a Dell computer—their service. The Dell tech took a hold of my computer remotely and restored it to its previous newness. Apparently, it was the Cookies' fault. One of them was fighting with the Thunderbird cookies. Naughty cookies. When I told the tech that the only reason I downloaded Thunderbird is because I couldn’t figure out how to use the email program that the computer came with, he set it all up for me. I think the whole thing only took about an hour and a half. I feel much better now.
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